“This is just for the store”, I said when going on a glam and glitter hunt through Los Angeles to find trend setting, unusual, rare or simply must have Rebelle pieces for other women, not me. It was a business exploration for my brand new shop ReBelle, “unique fashion for Rebelle prices”. I had missed being an entrepreneur focusing on writing my memoir and was glowing; I made a step into my own fashion world with this baby step opening doors to something new…
Back home after six hours of diving into shiny stuff I sank on my faux fur covered sofa and texted my friend Ruth; “we have to go out on New Year’s Eve.”
Wait, what? Both of us were passionately in love with “stay at home” peace and meditation new-year-nights for several years. I was adamant about rejecting new years parties for many reasons, mostly it felt “too much”. Resistance is a guide but I wasn’t watching.
“You’re definitely not a glitter girl,” said my head.
"Give in to the sparkle", the sequins whispered.
My hands ran over the first black sequin dress I tried. My body felt curvy and sensual like a snake; a tiny explosion happened and electrons sparked new pathways in my brain. I remembered this feeling of feminine glam; it felt ancient and it felt like 28.
Like in “your vibe attracts your tribe” my inner sparkle clicked with thousands of shiny little paillettes. They got me, blinding my old beliefs of not wanting to be “out there”, not wanting to shine so brightly; maybe on pictures but not so much in real life and especially not on on parties. I had experienced “nobody is looking at me” at a book signing party a couple years ago and, dolled up in my midlife body, my reaction had been “It’s over, I’m too old.”
The painful feeling of being invisible was still lingering in my mind even if life coaching and my own outfits exploring “fashion therapy” had happened; with every dress up I had gained more confidence and child like, playful fun. Ageless was my motto and I was gradually filling its heels and boots and chucks, giving a finger to the years on my birth certificate. Many of my limiting beliefs fell off like rattling chains. Underneath I discovered a new confidence, one based on knowing more of who I truly am. Especially that sweet ingredient of self love made me look into the mirror with appreciation of everything I am instead of focusing on what’s “wrong with me.”
”Outfits empower,” I propagated, “they tell stories, open our eyes and are tools to express our truth and attract our like minded tribe.” Yay. So cool. Of course I‘m writing a book about it…
But - I didn’t expect the bam!!! of the bright silver sparkle of my sexy little Zara dress. Outfits have vibrations and this one hit me sweetly as only a soul sister can.
I’d like to be one of the celebrating crowd, see and be seen, hug and be hugged.
This unexpected thought was a bit of a goose bumps producing revelation; I had been sparkled by the fairy dust of sequin.
Okay then, but as a Rebelle I need the edge! So I went Top Shop. I even dared the crop top.
When we let go and follow the voice of feelings instead of our rational mind magic happens.
For me, silvery Zara had happened and satiny Balmain opened the next chapter.
Rebelle wears harem pants? I laughed. This was so much fun.
I also did not expect that I’d crave to keep it all and that putting outfits into the shop is a sigh of “good bye pretty thing” each time.
Months ago I had coined the quote “If you want to be forever young, you have to do young things.”
Stepping out of our judgments is one of those things; I was convinced that glam and glitter wasn’t really my style but for the sake of my fashion journey and now the store I jumped in. Literally. Into sequin pants. It was like the bell ringing in my head, this “wow, I love this.”
The teenager’s “whatever” can freeing; whatever you think about yourself do it anyway, all that can happen is an experience. We don’t want to miss being surprised by ourselves by saying NOPE to fast.
When we do something new, something changes in us. New input creates new feelings or awakens long forgotten ones. And, after we dared, we luckily can’t go back to who we were before.
For me sequin is the beginning of a new fashion episode in which I feel into a new role, a different part of me. Fashion tells us stories, if we are open to listen.
LA is Hollywood. So here I am. In the theatrical world of old Hollywood, caressing the revived velvet’s, satins and sequins of times gone by. I started watching Mrs Fisher’s Murder Mysteries with beautiful outfits of the 20’s.
Watch out for my journey into Hollywood.
Let’s give in to the sparkle.
Glitter at any age.