I went to an upscale supermarket today. A midlife lady behind sliced cheese wrapped in plastic offers tastes. She doesn't smile.
I taste one because I wasn't in a great mood either. I was in a "eff effing diets" mood. Mmh, this little square on a tooth pick was good. Cheesy with herbal overtones... "Kosher," she throws at me with a smokey voice. "Glutenfree."
Her face says: I could care less...
I try the one with Wasabi, girl that's good. I mean, plastic fantastic cheese on the warm, fresh baked baguette which had just landed in my cart? Heaven, yes. French culture meets American cheese perversion. I love contrast.
Yes. I take a pack.
I really am in that mood.
"Congrats," she says, "Its Mel Gibson's favorite."
I nearly tossed it back into her basket.
Why would she think mentioning the right wing womanizing weirdo would impress me?
I look at her again. 50+ maybe 60? She has the typical casual class Malibu touch...Mel lived in Malibu for years. Perhaps she hung out at parties with the guy. I felt tempted to spin a story of how this once rich Malibu woman lost it all...and has to sell cheese.
Okay. I keep the 12 wasabi spiced thin slices.
I would be smile devoid, detached too. I would feel embarrassed. Who wants to sell cheese in general - but at midlife ? With Mel Gibson as a tagline?
One of my anti ageist story ideas is to apply for jobs and only reveal my age when arriving at the interview. I thought of applying for hostess at Moby's vegan "Little Pine" as it's around my corner and he's an "advanced" human. Would he accept a sassy 60?
Then I actually imagined working there, serving the Millenial scene and - I freaked out. OMG. Please don't let me ever have to do this. At 60.
I stuffed myself with the plastic fantastic cheese and the gorgeous baguette. I don't know if I'm in a cheese trance but I wanna run back and hug this woman.
Lesson: not everybody has a supportive hubby, the inheritance of a dead hubby or lucrative divorces and abundant funds from wherever.
Not every midlife woman dabbles in Dior.
Let's all support each other so that at this time of our lives we don't have to sell cheese in a supermarket.